Posts tagged ‘romance’

August 16, 2009

iljb#45: The IDEAL Guy: “STORY TIME”

The guy on the left is my boyfriend…er what I want my boyfriend to look like. haha. So its crazy how I stumbled upon this video. I was listening to “Little Bit” by this guy and later on clicked on his other videos and saw his brother. I wanted to see what his brother looked like without glasses…and low and behold, I found my IDEAL guy.

I’m pretty sure this guy isn’t gay, but he does have features that remind me of every other typical gay Pilipino. haha which is good because he looks like the type of guy I’d get with =] RAWR. Anyway, I have been having this picture of this guy I want in my head now for the last couple of weeks and well I got his personality, background, and everything down, but his face…FINALLY today I stumbled on his face =] hehe.

So my ideal Guy? Well, I’m excited haha I’ve been meaning to blog about it for dayssss! Here we go! (BTW, I will be describing this guy as though I have already met the guy and know him =] thats what “THE SECRET” tells me to do haha)

So this guy and I met somewhere around SF … er around the bay area at a party/club/event something. I saw him and he saw me. I kind of just looked away but would catch a glimpse of him looking back at me. I thought it was fun because where ever I was, I was having a boring time, so he excited me. He didn’t look gay to me so I didn’t think much of it. But I did continue to glance at him whenever I could and I would see him do the same which made me giggle. The night is drawing to close and he actually comes closer to me and bumps me on accident – he or I drop something – and we both bend down to pick whatever we dropped up – it was definitely like the movies LOL – He then held whatever he dropped in his hand as he lightly wrapped his hand around mine. We both get a glimpse of each others eyes and for a moment it seemed like he and I were the only two people in the room.

He then apologizes and continues his way. I look back and smile. So my friends and I are about to leave and well I see him again taking another glance at me while he takes a sip of whatever he’s drinking as he casually continues to talk to his friends. He dresses nice thats for sure. That night I couldn’t help but think about him and how cute he was…didn’t even bother to ask his name…then again I thought he was straight haha.

So, the week goes on and I slowly forget that guy…I’m looking through facebook or something and there he is…just randomly THERE. haha I check his profile, but its private. So I say fuck it nm. haha but it does make my day. A few days later…I log on again and pop a message from that guy. He writes something cheesy along the lines of, “Hey you were at that lame party right?” haha he gets me to chuckle. however I message back saying, “yeah that was me”…I leave it pretty much short and sweet. He then replies with a smart ass remark like, “Deng like that?” I couldn’t help but laugh so I replied to him apologizing and asking him what was up. He replies saying, I caught his attention or whatnot. After reading that, I started to get red and giggle a lot. He continues asking if we could meet up for coffee or something. I then agree.

So the day that we meet up, he is looking FINE. I mean crisp and on point. This guy does dress to impress…When I see him I shake his hand, but the first thing that catches my attention is his scent – his cologne. I blank for a second and he gives me a weird look like “are you okay?” We then get coffee or whatever the hell we do decide to do. We sit down and he explains why he was at that party or event. I can’t help but attentively listen to what he has to say…he’s cute when he talks. His lips are to die for and his eyes are just A-MAZ-ZANGGGG hahahahahahahahahahahah. BTW, his name is so unique and very interesting. I like. I then share why I was there too…You can tell he’s a listener cause he is nodding and making eye contact…this makes me nervous cause I never had someone do that in awhile.

I look at the clock and time just has flown by…I ask if he wants to take it somewhere else and he then agrees. I’m not sure where we go, but it somewhere nice with people walking around. We continue talking and I then ask him THE question, “So…are you.” He then stops and looks at me. I then start to apologize, but he interrupts by saying something cute like, “Why do you think I asked you to go get something with me.” I mean this guy got swag and this guy got me going hard. We’re walking and its such a nice day, one of those rare warm days in the bay. He then asks me more questions that are somewhat deep. I answer and I ask him similar questions.

Time is definitely passing by and I start to look at my clock or whatever. He notices and ask if I need to be somewhere and I reply with no. He then makes some kind of joke. The thing about this guy is, he’s easy to talk to and I don’t have to ask much. He doesn’t talk about totally random stuff or FILLERS to just make the conversation flow, but he just talks as if we already have been friends for awhile. We then part ways and thank each other for a wonderful night/day. We told each other we’d call or text or something.

After that, I just couldn’t get over the fact that this guy…THIS guy was actually talking to me. lol I was definitely enamored. I didn’t want to look or act desperate so I waited for his text or call. Days went by and nothing. I kind of got sad. However, just at the right time, he calls me and asks if we could hang out again soon. I started to smile on the phone and well we set up another “date”.

What I realized about this guy, hes very charming and sweet. I mean really sweet. The type of guy you would bring home to mom. He’s Pilipino, but he doesn’t really know much about his heritage. This date, I decide to school him on some information about Pilipinos in the bay area. He is excited and really takes everything in. What I also like about him is he truly knows how to listen and pay attention. He asks a lot of questions and just assures me that he does like what I’m talking about. He is very family oriented from the conversation we have. He has siblings and hes the oldest. He’s about 23-26 btw. He works and he tells me how he got his job, which is pretty impressive. He has already graduated from some college, which makes me more motivated to continue to seek higher education. He’s out to his friends and his family, they actually support him a lot in whatever he does…just as long as he provides for the family.

He definitely enjoys basketball and singing. He explains a little basketball when we hang out. I look at him with a confused look. He then tells me that he and I will go shoot some hoops. He also light weight serenades me with his favorite song. Which surprises me cause its not your typical song. He is medium built. He explains that he loves to run and work out. I too chime in with liking to run too. We both laugh and say the cliche “We have a lot in common aye?” He explains his past very light weight – he has a lot of trust issues and thats because a lot of people have been shaddy to him including family. So when it comes to trust he says its a must and its important. We some how talk about relationships and he explains he’s not looking for one in particular right now and I nod my head, kind of sad, but he then comes back with, “But I don’t mind this right here!” HE IS A FUCKING TALKER! AWWWWWWWWWW lol.

But thats pretty much the end of date two. haha the rest is history right? hehe

Well…=] theres my guy and I’m lucky to call him mine =] hehe.

September 14, 2008


I think I’m going to start compiling all the wonderful messages I get on youtube to remind myself that I’m not alone and that this “romance of a movie dream” I have for myself…does happen. Its cute cause its like AWWWW see it does happen ūüėÄ hehe…I’ve been so out of it lately cause recently I’ve just been fantasizing about…that romance…shrugs…=P blahhh =( I’m sad again. lol

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September 8, 2008


I’ve been so MIA on youtube its ridiculous! Luckily for me, I’m okay with it. I’ve been having urges to just do a vlog or a video, but I’m like…nah I’m coo off of that right now. I guess I wasn’t lying in saying that I’d be busy once school begins. Its crazy because I’m have a slow start right now, but my weeks ahead will be jam packed full of reading and projects. Speaking of which, I am very much behind on doing my DAI project due on Tuesday -_- UGHHH. I am overwhelmed…being that its almost 4am on Monday…you can say that I am even more overwhelmed. Dammmmmm-it! haha.

Its been an eventful few weeks here in the city, most recently in fact. Partying like theres no tomorrow has been a recent habit of mine and my friends. But its well deserved right? (Yes Joaquin! haha)

Anyway, what really impelled me to write a blog is the fact that I’m stuck with not knowing what to say for tomorrows pace open house. Honestly, thats shocking. I guessed I procrastinated in doing this because I felt I could just conjure up something like *snap* that, unfortunately its 4am like I said, with nothing but blank pages. SIGH. Additionally, a shocking turn of events while staying on aim tonight…

Josh mother fucking Perion IMs me. Who the hell is that? He is the guy I had the fattest crush on during my Sophomore-Junior year in HS – oh did I mention hes straight? MAN…oh man. So it made me smile and made me turn my head because it was like …WTF? Unexpected. Flashes of Josh and I came back and I’m like WOW…just taken a back. Josh Perion! WTF? So I tell him my updated life and how I’m up trying to figure out what to say in tomorrows open house. Tell me why he’s like giving me advice on what to do and like complimenting me on how he remembers how well I did speeches and shit. I’m like – REAL fucking talk? He was being real fresh with me that I remembered how much I fell for his personality and how I eventually had the biggest infatuation with him in hs because of it. UGH…straight people…I hate yal mother fuckers. haha. I swear, like I say, everyone is gay until proven otherwise. Josh mother fucking Perion…ughh how much did you fuck up my emotions. It all started with him – the first straight guy who gave me those “feelings”. The first straight guy who made me question sexuality. UGH…and his friend Miguel…o m g! ahhhhhhhh haha…I dunno how he looks like anymore, but I hear he looks fuggly. People would say he looked gross or he’d have a bad rep from other folks…but I’d always give him the benefit of the doubt…I dunno why…

I sat in church today and prayed to God once again asking him to help me through the week. Sigh…I cried Saturday night to my friends…I was a very emo drunk…everything and anything sparked emotion and tears…its weird because I had a very fun night…but just things just sparked my emotions that I ended up crying to sleep =/. Emotionally fucked and damaged, I feel like how I interact with others comes off wrong or too forward, considering how fucked and damaged my past has been. I feel I don’t know how to “talk” to a person or “get to know” a person anymore. I feel like…everything is whatever…and the thought of wanting a REAL man to satisfy my needs is nothing more but a fantasy.¬†

However, I must say, I am happy for my roommate, whos found unexpected romance this past weekend. Since he doesn’t often talk, do, or experience the things I often take for granted, it was cute hearing how he felt and his reactions to the whole thing.¬†Reminiscing¬†back on innocence back in the day sadden me. Oh how I wished I could do things differently.¬†

On another note, I’ve seriously been getting folks who still say I look like Mitch from Supreme Soul. At the party, some girl was like you look like Mitch…REAL talk…REAL talk stop it! Oh and one of my coworkers found my youtube…she said, “All I got is love for you.” What is that supposed to mean? haha Oh I had a wonderful photoshoot with my roommates and friends recently. I’ll post em soon =P …blah back to the grind…wish me luck.¬†

PS. Thanks for those who view this page and comment. I really do appreciate the feedback and love =]. Especially if its one of my subscribers from youtube. hehe.

September 4, 2008

cute guys

I’m a sucker for cute guys. TOTAL sucker. But I will be reminded by what Jay told me yesterday, “Maybe you should focus on school first”. Thought I’d just brush what he said off, but honestly it has been on my mind lately. UGH, but thats another story. What this entry is about is what gets me all crazy about cute guys.¬†

Where to start? MMMM

The face. I’m a sucker for clear, cute, faced guys. If they have a line up of some sort, I go crazy. If they have chinky eyes even better! Crispy brown complexion =] yum. Physically, I like them medium built. Not too skinny and not to frumpy haha. I like guys who wear fitted hats. Gets me all the time. I like a guy who smiles a lot. SOOO much that is hurts me to see their face. I like a guy who takes care of their nails. Hate long nails. I’m a sucker for guys who have nice calves and arms. LINE UPSSS. I’m not so much an ab¬†guy…but its cool haha. FACE value is what really gets me. Guys who have deep voices or a really soothing voice is always a plus. LOVE IT! Makes me go crazy. A guy who is the SWEETEST most darnest thing you ever met. Polite and¬†courteous¬†gets me. ¬†I LOVE PILIPINO GAY BOYS WITH CUTE SMILES AND CUTE FUCKINGGGGGGG PERSONALITY!

haha oh man…number one though…SCENT! You can be butt ugly and have the bombest scent that I’d still go crazy HAAHA.¬†

sigh…I think the point of this entry is to show how crazy I can get…I hate going to malls esp at serremonte cause I see the guys I want! hahaha…UGH EVERY GUY NEEDS TO BE GAY ALREADY! hahahahahahahah fucking shit…blah =(¬†

I’m sad because I really do need to focus on school and get my mind out of the day dream I live in daily. hahaha¬†

I told Jeremy and JP, “You know you’re cute and made it if a guy guy thinks you are!”¬†

PS. My guilty pleasures are black guys LOL hahahahahahahaahha