Archive for September 19th, 2009

September 19, 2009

random type.

i just want to type and this type of type is something that i write. im too preoccupied with things that are on my mind and i just keep on writing. i continue to write because it is my therapy. this remedy that helps me clear my thoughts and helps me move into a better state of mind. this sf state of mind has been helping me shape my future. my future is so bright its blinding. i believe that i learned more these past three months than i ever did in my whole life. this type, this type of feeling, emotion, this type of…i feel this type. i continue to write because it helps me. i think about today and how productive i am. my mom would be proud knowing that her son was on the grind and was doing too much, but still on point. on a saturday i spend at a library. in front of papers, pens, and this screen. i continue to make this place a home far away from home. no longer a freshman, no longer fresh out of the game, but alumnus, alumni, i know this better than i know most things. i am a better, brighter individual who continues to rock that beat, who continues to make sure that what i create today, is the creation of my future tomorrow. i love the way i do this, that, i listen to the beat of my heart. its crazy that when i got here, there was plenty, but now i look at a few, i just continue my work…i only have to get through this math problem. but thats my problem…i hate math. but i know if i add him to the picture i get an equation so right, that it boggles my mind. i write, i type, im ready to go and do my homework. finish what i started. here i go. here i am world.

September 19, 2009

iljb#50: I’m BFBRN

Sitting in a library on a Saturday isn’t exactly what I call “fun”, but I guess I have to do what I got to do to stay on top of things right? (BTW, I am still procrastinating on my actual homework lol). These past two weeks ever since school has become a lifestyle in my life, I have been making it a point to go to the annex and get some work done. I realized that my apt. isn’t really the best idea to get this kind of work done…then again, here I am sitting, writing this blog. lol. I must say, I’ve been piling on dates after dates on my agenda and icalendar. Most of it happens to be academic. CRAZY, I feel like an adult…I’m a “Big Fucking Boy Right Now (BFBRN)”. I’m doing big things and I feel good that I can handle this shit. Its overwhelming, but at the same time…this is nothing compared to what teachers have to face, so I’m taking it with strides.

When I finish my semester, I want to be able to look back and say DAMN RIGHT I’M A FUCKING BOSS! lol. This sem. is definitely going to test my skills in working under pressure, esp. with deadline after deadline. In addition working two jobs. Speaking of which, I calculated my finances (I guess I was balancing my checkbook? lol) and I estimated with the two jobs I have, I can possibly save 5,000 dollars by the end of this sem. You know how amazing that sounds and how crazy it will be if I do accomplish that? I swear, this secret business is working like nothing. In the very beginning of the semester, I made goals on what I want to accomplish before school began and they were big goals…pay debt, help family expenses, etc. When I looked back on that list today, I checked off most of it with the Masters program left as an exception. I am so proud of myself. So setting this goal to save 5,000 is possible and I can do it. It just takes time and most definitely patience, who knows, I could possibly make more than that.

Christmas already looks brighter =]. But honestly, did I really try and balance my checkbook lol…theres got to be an easier way =P however, I like my way. lol. MAN…this is what it means to be an adult? lol I basically still had $347 left for October after Septembers bills roll through. Ahhhh mazing =]. MAN I am so blessed…so grateful. SO FRIGGING happy.

Additionally, this “boy” has just got me smiling for days =]. ENOUGH said.

Anyway, I should get started with my lists…K. HW begins at 4:20 =] haha.

BFBRN! WORD!

September 19, 2009

cute video =]

I’m really getting to know this ‘one’. it feels great. it feels like … man… =] if this is what happy feels like…then i wanna be happy all the time =].